Search and Seduce Page 15

  “Please, Amy,” Mark said.

  She nodded. “Gather the dogs by the tunnel for me?”

  “Of course.”

  Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Mark move toward the puppies. In front of her, Luke spun on his heels, heading for the kennel. She moved to follow him, and T.J. grabbed her arm.

  “Wait up, Ames,” T.J. said, falling in step at her side.

  “I don’t want to talk about it, T.J.,” she said. “I’m embarrassed enough as it is.”

  “Don’t be. Hell, I’m happy for you. And to be honest, not that surprised. I’ve seen the way Mark looks at you. But are you sure you know what you’re doing? He’s heading out. Sooner than you think.”

  T.J. drew her to a stop. “Amy, I don’t want to see you hurt. You’re family. I’ve known you since I was in the seventh grade. You’re like the sister I never had. I know I don’t have a say in who you date, but I don’t want to see you lose another man you care for.”

  “I won’t,” she said, but inside she knew it was possible. Her rules wouldn’t keep Mark alive when he deployed. And she suspected they wouldn’t stop her from caring for him, missing him when he left.

  Panic rose and she wanted to run from it, the same way she’d dashed out of her husband’s burial. Why was it so damn hard to escape feeling trapped, boxed in by her life and the people around her?

  “I need to go,” she said, pulling her arm free. “I’m sorry you found out like this. Believe me. But I would appreciate it if you would keep this between us.”

  “Hell, you think I want to be the one to tell Mom?” T.J. said, his eyes widening.

  “There’s no reason to tell her,” she said quickly. “You’re right. This won’t last.”

  Mark returned from the nearby training area and moved to her side. In his hands he held her discarded shirt. “No one is going to tell Mrs. Benton,” he said, his voice firm. “Amy was just looking for a way to blow off a little steam. Nothing more.”

  Amy heard those words and knew she’d hurt Mark. That had never been her intention. Never. She’d been so selfish. She’d wanted to move on, wanted sex—and she’d wanted him. But Mark wasn’t a “nothing more.” He’d spent too long living by that definition, believing others deserved more than him—especially here in Heart’s Landing.

  Mark turned to her, offering a reassuring smile. Her stomach churned, and Amy worried she might toss the cookies she’d eaten for breakfast. She should be the one soothing him with plans to write a new set of rules.

  Foxtrot sat on her foot. One glance at her most promising dog and Amy knew she couldn’t do it. This place, these animals, were her future. The rules stood, no amendments and no changes. She bent over and scooped up the puppy. “I need to go.”

  Moving quickly, cradling Foxtrot against her chest, Amy headed for the door to the kennel. Inside, she turned to Mark. T.J. followed behind, holding the door for the last of the dogs.

  “I’ll be back,” she said, setting Foxtrot down. “I need to drop by Eloise’s place.”

  Mark caught her arm. “I’m sorry, Amy. I should have known they’d come looking for us.”

  “Don’t apologize,” she said, her hand on the doorknob. He’d defended her and helped her keep her emotions in check, forming a buffer between her and the Benton brothers. Without Mark, she might have spilled her secrets.

  She glanced over his shoulder at T.J., who remained on the far side of the room giving them space. “You saved me out there,” she added.

  Mark’s hand fell to his side, releasing her. “Most of the time when people tell me that, I’m in a helicopter above a war zone.”

  “There are different types of saving.”

  “I know.”

  “You’ve been saving me, helping me pick up the pieces, for the past year and a half,” she said. “Thank you.”

  Mark raised his hand to the back of his neck. “You don’t have to thank me, Amy. You helped me right back. The past few days have been great...fun.”

  Amy nodded, knowing there was so much more to the time they’d spent together. She had a feeling he did, too.

  * * *

  TWENTY MINUTES LATER, she walked into Eloise’s office. Daisy, the gray-and-white office cat who looked as though she could give the best guard dog a run for his money, greeted her with a suspicious swish of her tail. Only a cat could manage a look that said, I know you, but I’m still not sure I trust you.

  “I know you’re not the only one in the office, Daisy.”

  “I’m back here,” her cousin called from an exam room.

  Amy walked past the reception desk and down the hall with Daisy at her heels. Standing in the open doorway, Amy scanned exam room one. File folders covered the metal table. No sign of a four-legged patient. “Pressing paperwork?”

  Eloise shrugged. “I need to catch up. I have a busy day tomorrow.”

  “Uh-huh.” Amy didn’t buy that excuse for a minute.

  “What are you doing here?” Eloise asked without looking up. “Everything okay with your dogs?”

  “They’re fine.” Amy walked into the room and sat down in the blue plastic chair in the corner. “The morning training session went south, but for me, not the dogs. Luke and T.J. caught me fooling around with Mark.”

  Her cousin glanced up, eyebrows raised. “Look who’s wild now.”

  “Yes. And it felt so good at first.” Daisy jumped into her lap, and Amy began petting her. “But now I’ve made a mess of everything.”

  “Luke and T.J. will get over it.”

  “I know, but I told them it was a fling. In front of Mark.”

  “I thought you two were on the same page.”

  “We are. But, Eloise, he shouldn’t be someone’s secret. Mark should have a home with a woman willing to make the necessary sacrifices to become a military wife.” She held tight to Daisy, petting her, seeking comfort in the cat’s low and steady purr. “And that’s not me. I can’t do it again. I thought about what a long-term relationship would look like between us, and it would put me right back where I started. Waiting and afraid.”

  “I wouldn’t be so sure about that.” Eloise closed the open file folder and set it aside. “You’re not the same person you were when you met and married Darren.”

  “Older and wiser, and look where it landed me. In bed with an airman. I tried writing my own rules. I tried to follow your lead, and I failed. And I’m afraid I hurt Mark in the process.”

  “You fell in love with him.”

  Amy let out a laugh. “No, I’m pretty sure there is a firm barrier between selfishness and love. I’m solidly on the self-serving side right now.”

  “What if you stayed there for a little longer and thought about what you want, not what Mark deserves?” Eloise challenged.

  “I can’t,” Amy said. “There’s no room for selfish wants and needs in a relationship with a military man. One thing I learned while married—you love the man, but he’s a solider first. His duty to his country comes before your relationship, before everything else in your lives.

  “I’ve finally built a life for myself,” she continued. “I don’t want to give it up. I need to end things with Mark and move on.”

  Eloise nodded. “Sounds like a good plan.”

  “But he’s only here a few more days. “ Amy closed her eyes. “See, I’m being selfish again, wanting him, even though I know it will be harder on both of us when he leaves.”

  “I bet Mark likes this selfish side of you. In my experience, a man does not follow a woman into an exam room and strip off her stockings out of the goodness of his heart.” Eloise reached for another file folder. “This might sound like a silly question because you have obviously thought this through, but have you even asked him if he wants more?”

  “I... You’re right.” She stood, setting Daisy on the floor. “I need to go back and talk to him.”

  “Take some gluten-free dog treats with you,” Eloise called after her as she headed down the hall. “So you can at least
pretend you didn’t come here only for my relationship advice.”

  Amy grabbed a bag from the reception area display shelf and headed for her truck, pausing when she opened the door. Was she making a mistake taking advice from a woman who spent her Sunday doing paperwork instead of dealing with her own feelings? Would talking to Mark change anything?

  Probably not. But she owed him a conversation even if it ended with goodbye.

  19

  “DON’T LOOK AT ME like that.”

  Jango sat on his bed in the corner of Amy’s kitchen, watching as Mark searched for a pad of paper and a pen. Finding what he needed, Mark wrote a quick note for Amy and set it on the table.

  “I’ll be back in a few hours,” he said to the suspicious dog. “It’s your job to make sure she sees that note. I don’t want her thinking I got spooked after this morning and ran away.”

  He was running, but it wasn’t away from her. He was barreling headfirst past the barrier erected by her rules, bypassing words like fun, and rushing straight for a word he had shied away from for as long as he could remember—commitment.

  Mark tapped the piece of paper on the table. Jango lay down on his bed, his gaze fixed on the note. If there was one thing this dog loved, it was a mission.

  “Sometimes I think you understand everything we say,” Mark muttered as he went to the front door.

  Outside, T.J. stood beside his mother’s compact sedan. Mark headed over, wondering if this was a bad idea. Maybe he should wait here and talk to Amy when she returned. To hell with the grand gestures.

  “Thanks for coming,” Mark said when he reached the passenger-side door. “I’d go myself, but I need your wheels and your expertise.”

  “No hard feelings, man.” T.J. slid into the driver’s seat and started the engine. “Not from me. Luke? Well, he’s another matter.”

  Mark nodded. Luke’s feelings didn’t concern him. Right now, Amy was all that mattered.

  They drove in silence past Heart’s Landing’s familiar landmarks, including The Last Stop Diner. Beyond the town limits, the landscape turned to trees and farms.

  “Mind telling me why you’re hell-bent on making this trip today?” T.J. asked.

  “I want to do something for Amy.” Mark focused on the tall pines outside the window. “Show her that I care.”

  T.J. steered the car onto the four-lane highway. “Most women like flowers, chocolate, a night out at a place where they charge you five times what the food is worth.”

  Shit, he didn’t know the first thing about flowers and chocolate. He doubted Amy wanted to leave her dogs behind for a night out in Portland, where the restaurants fit T.J.’s description. “Amy’s not most women.”

  T.J. nodded. “She’s special. I’ll give you that, but I still think flowers might be the way to go.”

  Doubt hung over his head. Was he making a mistake dragging T.J. out for a three-hour round-trip shopping adventure when Amy would rather have a dozen roses?

  “I want to leave her with something she can use,” Mark said. “Something that will keep her safe.”

  “You’re the one who’s trying to win the girl.” T.J. took an exit. “Check the directions. I haven’t been to this place in years, and I want to make sure we don’t get lost on back roads in the middle of nowhere.”

  “I’m not trying to win her. Amy is not a prize. I just want her to know she means something to me.” Mark scrolled through the directions on his phone. “Turn right at the next light.”

  A while later, they pulled up to the store. Mark had called ahead to make sure it would be open on a Sunday afternoon. The lights were on, and two cars were parked in the lot.

  “Have an idea of what you want?” T.J. asked.

  “Whatever will offer her the most protection,” Mark said. “And make her smile when she sees it.”

  T.J. shook his head. “I hope you know what you’re doing.”

  * * *

  AMY OPENED THE FRONT DOOR and found Jango standing on the other side, tail wagging. She moved out of the way and waited for him to rush past her. But instead he barked and raced to the kitchen.

  “Hungry, boy? It’s a little early for dinner.”

  The Belgian Malinois sat beside the kitchen table and barked again. Amy walked over and spotted the note. Her stomach sank. Mark had left. Hurt by her words, he’d decided to cut his ties and return to base. Or worse, he’d been called back.

  Helpless dread threatened to overwhelm her. Amy closed her eyes and focused on breathing. Part of her wanted to run away now, escape to her kennel and seek comfort in her dogs.

  Jango barked, and she forced herself to open her eyes and pick up the paper, her hands trembling. She’d known from the beginning Mark was leaving. Leaving defined a soldier’s life. It was always a matter of time.

  Steeling herself, she looked down at the note in her hand.

  Needed to pick something up. Might take a few hours. I’ll be back for dinner.

  Mark

  P.S. I tried texting you, but found your phone beside the coffeemaker.

  Amy spun around and picked up her cell. She’d been in such a rush to get away and clear her head earlier, she’d forgotten to take it with her. Then she turned back to Jango, who’d moved closer to where she kept his treats.

  “Did he really go shopping?” she asked, reaching into the jar and pulling out a biscuit.

  Jango’s tail thumped against the floor, his eyes tracking her hand. She tossed the treat to him. Catching it, he retreated to his bed.

  “I guess I’ll find out.”

  Hours later, after she’d fed and played with her dogs, Amy headed back to the house. Still no sign of Mark. And this time, she’d kept her phone on her. She’d been tempted to call or text, but then thought better of it. He didn’t owe her anything.

  Elizabeth Benton’s car pulled up the driveway, and Amy slowed as she approached the front of her small home. Mark had gone shopping with her former mother-in-law?

  “Hi, Ames.” T.J. waved from the open driver’s-side window, adding another layer of confusion. T.J. hadn’t been the one ready to throw punches earlier, but she hadn’t expected him to take Mark, or anyone, shopping.

  “Hey,” Mark said as he climbed out and went to the back of the car.

  “Hi.” Amy tried to put the pieces of this puzzle together in her mind. Had he gone out for groceries, wanting to fill her empty kitchen before shipping out?

  Withdrawing a large rectangular box, Mark slammed the trunk closed and headed for the porch. “Thanks again, T.J.”

  “Anytime.” T.J. smiled at her. “Don’t blame me if you don’t like it. I told him to go with flowers.”

  Flowers? Why would Mark bring her flowers?

  “Ignore him.” Mark opened her front door. Amy followed him inside as the sound of the car on her gravel drive faded away.

  Carrying the large box as if it was featherlight, Mark led the way into the kitchen. He wore the same green camo-patterned cargo shorts he’d pulled on that morning, but he’d changed into a faded gray air force T-shirt. Amy studied the lettering across his strong, broad chest. It was the first time he’d worn clothing that labeled him a member of the US military since he’d arrived. Was that a sign he was heading back?

  “How are you?” He set the box down on the kitchen table. “Did you feed the dogs?”

  “Yes,” she said, staring at the box that did not contain flowers.

  Mark smiled and nudged it toward her. “You can open it, you know.”

  “You didn’t have to get me anything.” Her fingers snapped the Scotch tape securing the sides.

  “I wanted to.”

  Amy lifted the top and peered inside. Her eyes widened. Tossing the lid to the floor, she reached for her present. “You got me a compression sleeve?”

  “To help with the bite work.” Mark shoved his hands into his pockets, rocking back on his heels. Out of the corner of her eye—it was impossible to entirely tear her gaze away from her present—she saw Mar
k’s expression lit with excitement, as if he’d been worried she wouldn’t like the gesture.

  “I dragged T.J. along, and he said this was the best brand on the market and one of the few with a model made for women.” He pointed to the portion designed to protect her upper arm. “This part is solid, but the sleeve has room for movement. There’s a handle inside, and...do you want to try it on?”

  “Yes.” She turned the training tool over in her hands. She’d planned to order one at some point, but there had been so many things to purchase for the kennel that she’d put it off.

  Mark moved to her side and waited for her to hand over her gift. She complied, holding out her right arm. He slipped it on, and her hand found the handle inside. The large padded area extending from her forearm formed a triangular point perfect for training a dog to bite. It was big enough to force the pup to open his mouth wide, but also had some give, allowing the animal to hold on.

  While Amy turned it, admired the fit, which was perfect for her smaller frame, Mark reached into the box and withdrew two white cloth covers.

  “T.J. recommended these. One for the puppies and one for the adult dogs. The thicker one can be too hard for a young dog to hold on to.”

  She ran her hands over both, feeling the differences in the fabric. “I hadn’t thought about that,” she admitted.

  “So, you like it? Better than roses?”

  Looking up at him, something inside her melted. And she had a sinking feeling it was her resolve. His gift spoke directly to who she was and what was important to her. It said I understand you in a way that roses never could.

  “This is so much better than flowers,” she said softly. “But you didn’t need to go to all this trouble.”

  “Facing Luke and T.J., trying to explain what we’re doing together, something became clear to me.”

  Her grip tightened on the protective sleeve. It looked like a piece of armor, a protective barrier against attack. Too bad it didn’t cover her heart, because right now that was the most vulnerable part of her body.

  “Any man who comes into your life should treasure you. Romance you. You’re special, Amelia Mae.”